Papa designed marriage to be a haven, a place of refuge and rest, where you feel safe and protected. It all started in the Garden of Eden. But few truly seek His definition and the steps necessary to really have ‘Heaven on Earth’.
You see, in order to have a Covenant Marriage, you have to die first to the other person. It means they come before you. It means your first thought should be “What does he/she need? What would make them happy or put a smile on their face? What or how can I pray for them?
But before you can die to the other person, you have to get your relationship right with Papa (God). The majority do not understand this concept. This is what we are here to do. To help you get your relationship right with Papa, so you can live the way God intended His children to live together.
In the book ‘The Blessed Marriage’ by Robert and Debbie Morris, it goes into detail and explains this concept. We highly recommend you pick up a copy. This book really opened our eyes.
We wanted to be able to find the refuge in our marriage, but since Vik’s brain surgery, it has been a real struggle for both of us. The arguments, the hurt, a stranger in our midst. It has been a blessing in disguise for us, even though we didn’t realize it as we have walked through this. As we looked to Papa first and cried out to Him, He has helped us bring unity to our marriage. We have learned to open our hearts and love the other person more after realizing that they are the son/daughter of God, just as we are. They are just as important to Papa. Think of it like you would if you have children or fur babies. You wouldn’t like it if your children are being hurtful to each other and fighting all the time.
The Bible tells us to repent and surrender to God with all our heart. Well, as we do that, the Holy Spirit can work in us. In Philippians 4:6-7, it says:
Don’t worry about anything; instead pray about everything; tell God about your needs, and don’t forget to thank Him for His answers. If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus.
As we learn to rest in God’s peace and the Holy Spirit has softened our hearts and our minds, we begin to change our perspective. As this change comes about, we see our spouse/significant other differently and we are able to listen and try to understand where they are coming from. Then we can rebuild the foundation of our marriage with God at the center and we find our refuge where He always meant for it to be. Now, we start feeling the connection with each other which will lead us back to the refuge we desire within our marriage.